Day 14.

I can't tell you what days 1-12 were like, because around day 12 is when I started to wake up. I feel as if my entire life is shattered into pieces, and I'm desperately trying to pick up what's left. What I can tell you, is that I'm terrified, sad, desperate, and alone. Even if I start to feel better eventually, I will never be the same. I will never get over this. I will never understand why someone who was so happy and wanted to live so badly was taken from me and everyone he loved, so quickly. I wish I could say that day 14 is easier than day 1, but that would be a lie. Every passing day that I can't talk to him hurts worse than the day prior. I would do absolutely anything to have him back, even if just for a moment. You think you have all the time in the world...to buy a house, to start having kids, to grow old together. I learned very quickly and the hard way that it simply isn't true. There are so many things I would have done differently given the chance. There are also things I would have done the exact same way. I'm so grateful that we met, fell in love, and got married. I'm just so sad that it was cut so short.